>Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed.

>Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the

>brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this

>beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be

>shattered. I think, "It is better to drink this beer and let their

>dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."

>-- Babe Ruth

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in

>the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

>-- Lyndon B. Johnson

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend

>time with his fools.

>-- Ernest Hemingway

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

>-- Paul Hornung

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not.

>-- H. L. Mencken

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep.

>When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go

>to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!

>-- George Bernard Shaw

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

>-- Benjamin Franklin

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>Without question, the greatest invention in the history of

>mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine

>invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

>-- Dave Barry

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>BEER: HELPING UGLY PEOPLE HAVE SEX SINCE 3000 B.C.!

>-- W. C. Fields

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~! ~

>Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.

>-- Professor Irwin Corey

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group."

>Salvation in a can!

>-- Leo Durocher

>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>One night at Cheers, Cliff Clavin explained the "Buffalo

>Theory" to his buddy Norm:

>

>"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move

>as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is

>the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.

>This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the

>general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the

>regular killing of the weakest members.

>

>In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as

>the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know,

>kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest

>brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer

>eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more

>efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few

>beers."




on another note...

I knew I majored in Environmental Studies for a
reason...

http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/West/08/1...eut/index.html