Anyone have any stories from shitty jobs?
02-13-2003, 02:25 PM
#1
I Enjoy Posting At StuntLife!
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Chicago!
Age: 47
Posts: 1,197
Anyone have any stories from shitty jobs?
Before I became the classy, sophisticated, software engineer that I am today, I had a few "Less than glamourous jobs".
Wendys:
I worked at Wendys as my first job, nothing interesting would happen there except for the occasional "totally hilarious" person who would ask to speak with Dave Thomas...brilliant. Other than that I got kicked off of the registers for acting like the dining room was there to watch me sing into the mic and talk to them instead of call orders back to the cooks. My supervisor was mad, but deep down she thought it was pretty cool.
Telemarketing:
I worked as a telemarketer the summer between my senior year of high school and my freshman year old college. To make matters worse I was selling credit cards, nobody, I mean nobody wants to hear about a fabulous offer on a citibank visa card with a 5.9% introductory APR. Coupled with the fact that I was, in deed, calling people at their homes I was viewed as the spawn of satan and I was personally calling them to make their lives miserable. The most memorable call that I had was when some dumb bastard tried to rip off Seinfeld and be ultra-clever with me.
Clever guy: I'm not interested.
Me: Well sir, if you apply now you you will also recieve.....
Clever guy: I'll tell you what, you give me your home number and I'll call you and see how you like it.
Me: You know what? I saw that episode of Seinfeld too, and you think that you're being really clever, but you are not. Not only are you ripping off Jerry, but you didn't have the wherewithall to steal something that was actually good. Lastly, I'm not calling you because I have some sort of personal vendetta against you and I want to ruin your life. This is my job, I am just trying to earn an honest living. If you don't want the card, fine."
Another one that got me was how everybody accused me of purposefully calling during "dinner time". As if there is a designated time that everyone eats dinner that we purposefully call during that time just to **** them off. And yes, I did point that out to one guy on my last week of work.
Pizza Delivery Guy:
This was a good and bad job. Good in the sense that I ate my *** off - always bringing food home. This is key when you live off less than $100 a week. This job has so many stories, but the best one is when I strong-armed some little **** into tipping me when he intended to stiff me (******). It was a classic case of a 13 year old's parents going out for the night and giving the bastard child $20 to order pizza. I show up, I give him a pizza, he gives me a $20, I count out the change all the while waiting to here him say "Just give me $7 back" so I'd take that out for a tip. The pizza was $11, I gave him $9 back. He says "thanks" and begins to close the door. Since it was my last week of working there I decided to stand up for every pizza delivery man who has ever been stiffed. As the door began to close I deftly extended my arm and prevented the kid from closing it. He looked scared (excellent). I said, "I can't believe that you are not going to tip me. I know how this works, your parents are out for the night, they gave you $20 for pizza, and you think that you can stiff me and keep the rest. That's not cool." The kid looked nervous, he said, "How much should I tip you?" To which I replied, "I'm not gonna tell you, that's up for you to decide. For a reference, it's typically around $2." The young man gave me $2. I thanked him and reminded him to tip in the future. I was celebrated as a hero among the other pizza delivery guys back at the shop.
So let's hear your stories.
Wendys:
I worked at Wendys as my first job, nothing interesting would happen there except for the occasional "totally hilarious" person who would ask to speak with Dave Thomas...brilliant. Other than that I got kicked off of the registers for acting like the dining room was there to watch me sing into the mic and talk to them instead of call orders back to the cooks. My supervisor was mad, but deep down she thought it was pretty cool.
Telemarketing:
I worked as a telemarketer the summer between my senior year of high school and my freshman year old college. To make matters worse I was selling credit cards, nobody, I mean nobody wants to hear about a fabulous offer on a citibank visa card with a 5.9% introductory APR. Coupled with the fact that I was, in deed, calling people at their homes I was viewed as the spawn of satan and I was personally calling them to make their lives miserable. The most memorable call that I had was when some dumb bastard tried to rip off Seinfeld and be ultra-clever with me.
Clever guy: I'm not interested.
Me: Well sir, if you apply now you you will also recieve.....
Clever guy: I'll tell you what, you give me your home number and I'll call you and see how you like it.
Me: You know what? I saw that episode of Seinfeld too, and you think that you're being really clever, but you are not. Not only are you ripping off Jerry, but you didn't have the wherewithall to steal something that was actually good. Lastly, I'm not calling you because I have some sort of personal vendetta against you and I want to ruin your life. This is my job, I am just trying to earn an honest living. If you don't want the card, fine."
Another one that got me was how everybody accused me of purposefully calling during "dinner time". As if there is a designated time that everyone eats dinner that we purposefully call during that time just to **** them off. And yes, I did point that out to one guy on my last week of work.
Pizza Delivery Guy:
This was a good and bad job. Good in the sense that I ate my *** off - always bringing food home. This is key when you live off less than $100 a week. This job has so many stories, but the best one is when I strong-armed some little **** into tipping me when he intended to stiff me (******). It was a classic case of a 13 year old's parents going out for the night and giving the bastard child $20 to order pizza. I show up, I give him a pizza, he gives me a $20, I count out the change all the while waiting to here him say "Just give me $7 back" so I'd take that out for a tip. The pizza was $11, I gave him $9 back. He says "thanks" and begins to close the door. Since it was my last week of working there I decided to stand up for every pizza delivery man who has ever been stiffed. As the door began to close I deftly extended my arm and prevented the kid from closing it. He looked scared (excellent). I said, "I can't believe that you are not going to tip me. I know how this works, your parents are out for the night, they gave you $20 for pizza, and you think that you can stiff me and keep the rest. That's not cool." The kid looked nervous, he said, "How much should I tip you?" To which I replied, "I'm not gonna tell you, that's up for you to decide. For a reference, it's typically around $2." The young man gave me $2. I thanked him and reminded him to tip in the future. I was celebrated as a hero among the other pizza delivery guys back at the shop.
So let's hear your stories.
02-13-2003, 02:33 PM
#2
I Enjoy Posting At StuntLife!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Boston
Posts: 4,313
I used to run a pizza shop with a friend of mine. One day my friend is in the back talking to the owner and I'm working up front. All the sudden I hear BANG!! BANG BANG BANG! Two seconds later the kid goes flying by me and out the front door. The owner was cleaning his gun and told my friend to get back to work a couple times. My friend didn't really accnolege him untill he heard a bang and saw the smoking barrel. Then he started running. There were holes in the wall and two of the freezers. I got some other stories just no time to tell 'em.
02-13-2003, 03:47 PM
#3
I Have Too Much Free Time
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Diddleboro , MA
Age: 45
Posts: 12,735
I work in brockton. I do not have the time to tell you some stories from here. you can't imagine......crack ******, crack heads, drug addicts, drug dealers, gang bangers, crack slangers. Ive seen some ****!! 
Last edited by Jay Carnes; 02-13-2003 at 05:22 PM.
02-14-2003, 03:39 PM
#4
Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Plymouth, MA
Age: 43
Posts: 5,582
i got a BJ at work b4.. in my office..
was pretty funny ****
when i was like 16 i worked at McDs and i called in sick
forgot that i caled in.. and went there to pick up my friend.. lol that didnt go over well...
i used to work at wearguard.. they embroydered clothes.. but i saw a few peoplle stick thier hand in the machines by accident and have a large needle break off in thier fingers.. lots of times puncturing or shattering bones...
was pretty funny ****
when i was like 16 i worked at McDs and i called in sick
forgot that i caled in.. and went there to pick up my friend.. lol that didnt go over well...
i used to work at wearguard.. they embroydered clothes.. but i saw a few peoplle stick thier hand in the machines by accident and have a large needle break off in thier fingers.. lots of times puncturing or shattering bones...
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