A Hole in the Head

Why does a man's ***** have a hole in it?
So he can get oxygen to his brain.
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An Ugly Position

What's the position to make ugly babies?
Ask your parents.
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Baaaaad Breath

Yo' breath so stank, it's like your tongue farted!
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You're So Stupid... Color TV

You're so stupid, your mother told you to go buy a color television and you asked, “What color?”
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Osama = Crabs?

What do Osama bin Laden and crabs have in common?
They both irritate Bush.

 

One day a teacher went into her class room and saw the word, “*****” written in small letters on the chalkboard. She erased it and went on with the day's lesson. The next day, she came in and saw the same word on the chalkbaord, but a little bit bigger. She erased it and went on with her lesson.
Each of the next several days, the teacher would come in to find “*****” on the board, a little larger each time. She went in one morning, expecting to find it again, but instead the chalkboard read: “The more you rub it, the bigger it gets.”

 

bj that was quality made my smerk hehehe

 

Nice joke BJ - very funny - but I noticed Shawn edited it - was it wrong the first time? :p

 

Hey ya know i guess im here for something....Im just

here 2 help out...

 

Thanks Shawn - what would we do without you???

 

Funny ****

 

THATS FUNNY!

 

THAT'S WAY 2 FUNNY

 

SOME TIMES AT NIGHT I DREAM OF "JO JO"

 

A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I can’t stop passing gas. Luckily, my farts don’t smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I’ve farted twice since I’ve been here in your office, but you didn’t even notice."

"I can help you," says the doc. "Take these pills and come back next week."

The next week, the lady returns. "Doctor," she says, "I don’t know what you gave me, but now my farts reek."

The doctor says, "Good, we fixed your sinuses! Now let’s work on your hearing."

 

thats was a good one

 

Where do you find a dog with no legs?


Right where you left him.

 

So simple but so so funny...

 

How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?

Knock on the door

 

How do you make a cat go woof?

Douse it in gasoline and throw it in the fire ...


LOL LOL - these are getting funnier and funnier ...

 

There was this french guy and a black guy

they did not know each other but they road on the same bus to gether every day

now the french guy sits down on the in the bus and smells his fingers and says oh fefe oh fefe

the black guy saw what he was doing but ignored it

the next day the french guy gets on the bus again and does the same thing oh fefe oh fefe

so the black guy ask "what r u doing" french guy says "i finger my wife everyday so that i can smell her all day"

so the next day the black guy gets on the bus and sits down and smells is whole arm and says oh shaniqua oh shaniqua

 

Bubba, a man from down south, calls up his laywer to ask him a few questions ...
"Is it true," Bubba asks, "that people are sueing the tobacco companies because cigarettes cause cancer?"
"Yes," the laywer replies.
"And, is it true that people are sueing fast food companies for causing them to get fat and clogging their arteries by selling all those burgers and french fries?"
"Yes, Bubba, but why?" the laywer questions.
"Well, I was thinking of sueing Budweiser for all of these ulgy women that I have been waking up with lately..."

 

Two guys get busted for smoking dope, so they have to go into court on a Friday. They go to court and the judge says, "If you can convince more than 5 people to stop doing drugs for the rest of their lives, you won't be sent to jail."
So the two men agree and the judge tells them to come back on Monday.

So the two guys come back on Monday and the judge asks how they did.

''I got 17 people to get off drugs,'' says the first guy.

''Wow, how'd you do that?'' asks the judge.

''I used circles. I told them that this large circle is your brain before drugs and this small circle is your brain after drugs.''

''Oh, that's nothing!" said the second guy. "I convinced 156 people to get off drugs.''

''Wow. How'd you do that?'' asked the judge.

''Well, I used circles too. I told them this small circle is your butthole before prison...''

 

When does a boy become a man in Iraq?

When his diaper moves from his *** to his head. :p